Laws and Sausages....Things you never want people to see how you make 'em...From the healthy, Norton virus protected notebook of your commish. Wednesday October 21st, 2008 8:35 PM Rambling after Week 7 and the 2008 AAD Shrine Pig Roast... It was a good meal tonight - a couple hundred pounds of swine, some turkeys and all the fixings, throw in some $2 adult beverages and a bunch of assorted deserts and you have a full blown tummy ache. Seconds, although tasty, were not a good idea. The third brownie probably didn't help either.
So for my short advertisement - if you ever have the chance to eat at a future Shriner fundraiser, I'd highly suggest going for it. They are mostly old guys with big appetites and wives that have decades of culinary experience. You won't go away disappointed. Plus, the funds raised go towards supporting the Shriner's Hospital for Children. Enough said. On to tonight's episode of Dirty Jobs with Sir Michael Rowe. He appears to be on a sheep farm learning how to remove the berries from the twig if you get my drift. You'd never guess exactly how that is done if you didn't see what I just saw. Yep - the farmer made a small slit and then bowed his head in and sucked the nuts right out of the little guy. It's called "docking" the lamb. And you thought your job was bad. And yes, Mike Rowe did it too. Yuk. Double yuk. How about our election.....which one you ask? Well, we have to elect a bunch of morons this year to overpaid positions, none of which can hold up to my unrealistic expectations based on the fervor, astuteness and prudence of Josiah Bartlett. The two most visible races in northern Minnesota (at least if you watch any television or listen to the radio) are the Senatorial and Presidential races. Sam: This country is populated with unbalanced people, many of whom find their way to Washington, as if the continent funnels them into this one spot. Norman and Albert - I'm really really sick of those guys. It scares me that somehow their campaign strategies of smear advertisements is the best option they have to woo the voters to their chad on the ballot. I really don't know what either stands for other than they stand for the opposite of what their opponent stands for. (Really, lots of money could be saved by making one commercial that says just that -- "Norm stands against everything Al stands for and vice versa." There, clear as mud. Take the rest of the money they are spending and give it to the executives from AIG so they can maintain their quality of life (because god forbid those nitwits cancel their insanely expensive management trips because of small details like insolvency). I don't like everything he stands for, but I'm tempted to spend my vote for former senator Dean Barkley. I'd suggest you check out his website (www.senatorbarkley.com) - I don't expect him to win, but I do think he'll pull a pretty good percentage (20% or so) and show that many Minnesotans are sick of the two major parties and want a new option for our government. I'm not talking about "change we can believe in" or the need for mavericks to take over, I'm talking about someone going to Washington and doing something with little regard for their re-election 4 or 6 years down the road. Bartlet: I was watching a television program before, with a kind of roving moderator who spoke to a seated panel of young women who were having some sort of problem with their boyfriends - apparently, because the boyfriends had all slept with the girlfriends' mothers. And they brought the boyfriends out, and they fought, right there on television. Toby, tell me: these people don't vote, do they? The only problem with that is there are too many people out there that can not think for themselves. For example - I was told today that a local union hall was putting out information stating that whenever Republicans have been in office, unemployment has increased BUT when democrats have had the presidency, unemployment has gone down. Therefore, 2 + 2 being 4, democrats are better and I just need to show up and check the boxes with a big old "D" next to them. There is little to no exaggeration in the previous example. And that is one of many things that scare me about our country's future. And let's be done with politics.....we are now halfway through the 2008 BIGFFBL regular season. Kinger is undefeated - Smith is 6-1 and both have a 3 game lead in their divisions. After that, it is a logjam. The Bison Division especially - Suomala, Mike and JC are all at 4-3 with Jugs a couple steps back at 2-5. I think it's time for a few mid-season Best/Worst awards. Best/Worst Keeper -- Adrian Peterson (Jonny) and Braylon Edwards (Jugs). We really haven't had great keepers this year. Westbrook, Tomlinson, Brady, Addai and Parker have been hurt and S.Jackson, Brees and Manning have been inconsistent. Gore and Lynch have been ok, but not great. That leaves AP as the top performer so far and Braylon being the biggest disappointment. Best late round pick -- Steve Slaton, overall #140, wIZards (12th round). What were we all thinking? That somehow Ahman Green would be the guy? What really bugs me is that just a few picks before Scottie grabbed him, I took Deuce McAllister. Pretty sure it was at that point Jugs mentioned my RBs were an average age of 35. Best/Worst Free Agent Pickup -- Eddie Royal, WR, DEN (Voluntary Donkeys)/Andre Hall, RB, DEN (Drunken Sailors). Both players from the same team with differing amounts of success. Eddie has been a good #2 to Marshall while Andre Hall might just be killed in his sleep by Shanny after his horrible performance last night. Best/Worst scoring Divisions -- Bison (2,814) and Bulldog (2,461). Best/Worst point differential -- Kinger (+19.0) and Nookie (-12.0) Hey, we are getting closer.....IF THE PLAYOFFS WERE TODAY-AY-AY-AY......
Anywho, good luck all in week 8 (except for Juice and the rest of the Bison of course). And for this week's final word....
Need I say more? BIGFFBL senior writer Jeremy Carlson sounds off whenever he feels like it on www.bigffbl.com |