Blonde Tomorrow...

From the healthy, Norton virus protected notebook of your commish.  Tuesday October 18th, 2005 8.49 PM

Rambling after week 6...

Ok all....we're now 2 weeks into the first series of divisional play in the BIG and it seems that parity is running rampant.  As usual, some squads have been bitten by the injury bug while others are surely nervously biting their fingernails in hope that fate is with them this year.  So very fitting....'Here today, gone (or blonde --- keep reading to see why) tomorrow' is the headline of the week.

So I was on Google trying to figure out a bit of a theme for this week and I thought that since the Vikings players have been hitting up random women, I will hit up some random websites.  So how does a guy find some random websites?  Well, I went to none other than www.randomwebsites.com.  (you gotta love the simplicity of the internet).  Their opening page states, "don't leave the house with your fly open, make sure you've got up-to-date virus protection.) -- that is sound advice for both internet surfing as well as any trips across the bridge on a Friday night.

Anyways, the first site I got was, http://vodb.com.  I have no clue what it is since it is in German, or maybe Dutch.  Either way, I feel like Mike Tice and Daunte Culpepper studying a game plan on this one so let's move on....

Next I am directed to www.ritmoteca.com.  It appears to be some sort of music based site....and has some nice pics.  After focusing on Christina for a few minutes and trying to apply this in some way, shape or form to football (and NOT the Vikings three hour tour), I think of the team from down in the Bayou - those horrible New Orleans Saints.  I think I've made my dislike of Brooksie quite well known and OF COURSE the week I bench his ass, he pops for a solid 20+ week.  Nice.  This was the Brooks I expected - you know, the guy who gets 85% of his points in 4th quarter garbage time.  Joe Horn owners know what I'm talking about.

And up third is www.3colornegative.com.  Very cool opening page - at least for those of you who played enough Super Mario back in the day.  I can only imagine that this page is for some sort of original Nintendo fan club.  Ahh yes, nothing like the classics.  Kinda like seeing Wong and Suomala leading their respective divisions.  On the other side of the puzzle though, we're seeing the Bastards (who by the way probably deserve a bad year for all the good ones he's had) battle the newly wed for the Golden Throne.  As an aside, Mike deserves some extra credit for getting his points in early during Sunday's contests - unless of course Smitty was doing that for him -- my money is on the side of Mike enjoying his first married day by cracking a beer and watching the NFL all day long.....and if so, ATTA BOY.

We then fly on to www.bannedmusic.org.  Ahh, I could go so many ways from here, but let's talk a little about Mike and Sara's reception.  First off, if you or Sara know the DJ personally, I apologize in advance Mike.  The guy wasn't very good to put it nicely.....although for a big guy he had a damn good moonwalk and electric slide.  The reception was a good time, but for the rest of you unmarried guys (and for those who are keeping track, that's down to seven of the twelve of us) let's all remember that the other unmarried guys want to see hot, single, LEGAL ladies there, so plan your guest list accordingly.  But seriously now -- congrats to Mike, and best of luck.

So what else is out there?  How about http://techno-weenie.com/ or www.oletheros.com (which has an opening page that makes you wonder) or even www.calpundit.com.  But I think I've filled enough space, so let's go to some quick hit BIGFFBL notes....

Wong has taken over as the BIG career leader in winning percentage with a 0.573 clip.

Jonny has expanded his career losses lead over Smitty to 3.

And then there are the Fat British Pigeons, formerly known as....well, as a bunch of other stuff.....Smitty, who is under 0.500 for his career manages to currently hold the record for most points and most 100+ weeks.  Ahh yes, gotta love the luck factor.

The Flying Hellfish have moved to 6-0 with a win over fellow Bison division ball-n-chainer Mike.  But if you go by the numbers.....Suomala is the luckiest guy in the league so far this year -- but sometimes the ball bounces a guys way and a championship is won.

Jugsie continues his sweet streak with his current league high 5 game 100+ streak and continues his season long 93+ streak -- but he happened to go up against Air JC's big guy Shaun this week, so all was for naught as Jugs drops two games back of the 'Fish.

Nookie finds himself as the only team under 85 this week.....and it was far faaaar below, posting a 49er.  Good news for Ben though is that the Moss injury wasn't as bad as initially perceived.

Richie's Team GOO continues their 'hot streak' with his second 100+ of the year -- and that was on a Cardinals bye week.  At this point of the year, Rico's boys (no not THOSE boys) are my pick for making the biggest move in the second half of our season.

Jonny's team is solid but Daunte and his slippery fingers is killing the Tang.  I can't imagine where the Tang would be at with last year's Daunte playing in this year's games.

And how about Jason's Little Red Horse.  In the all-games records, Jason is second from the bottom, ahead only of Mike, but in the Bulldog division, Jason is 3-3 and only 1 game back of Smitty.  It's gonna be a dogfight to the finish in the Bulldog, but I'd predict Jason will end up at 7-7.....

Let's close it down with a joke.....and a good one if I don't say so myself.

There was a 19 year old hot blonde, distraught with her life, standing on the end of the Duluth Ariel lift bridge pier.  She's about to jump into the frigid waters of the big lake when she sees a sailor running down the pier at her.  She waits for him as he runs up and tells her, "No, don't jump....I am departing tomorrow on a ship for Europe and if you reconsider what you are doing and come with me, I will take care of you and we can live together happily ever after."  The blonde accepts and accompanies the seaman onto the large ship.  The seaman is faithful to his word, she stows away in his cabin and every day he sneaks her food, water, books and magazines to keep her entertained.  They also make passionate love each evening after he returns from his work on the ship and before he goes to sleep.  After about a week of this routine, the seaman's superior officer performs a surprise inspection of the crew quarters and discovers the blonde.  She attempts to explain the situation to the dumbfounded officer by stating, "I'm sorry sir, but the seaman saved my life and is taking me with you to Europe.  He's bringing me food and water and he's also screwing me."  To this, the officer replied, "He sure is screwing you.....this ship isn't going anywhere near Europe, you're on the William A. Irvin and this ship hasn't moved for years."

Need I say more?

BIGFFBL senior writer Jeremy Carlson sounds off whenever he feels like it on www.bigffbl.com